I have been touching on our marriage in our youtube videos. How things haven't been that easy lately, how the spark has worn off and we are still learning. The sad things is, a lot of people assume that marriage is easy, that the head over heels, butterflies in your stomach, easy going, can't wait to see you, miss you 24/7 feeling, lasts forever. For most of us that isn't the case and that's TOTALLY NORMAL.
A lot of people online aren't willing to talk about relationships, about their marriage, about how to work together. Sean and I finally sat down and started our research. We sought out ways to work on US! Prioritizing your relationship when you work, have kids, pets, chores, bills, it's not easy! Most things worth working for are not easy though, so I'm going to update you guys on a few things we have change that have made a HUGE difference over the last month.
We have recently started reading 'The Five Love Languages' by Gary Chapman. It's very affordable on Amazon, I'll link it HERE. It goes through how we give and receive love, how not everyone may feel love the same way others do. It helps you identify how you want to be shown love and how you should give love to your partner. Some people may like to receive gifts, or hear affirming love, others may want to cuddle or kiss. It's been helping us understand each other and has taught us how to work on things that may be triggering each other as well.
2. GO OUT!
You should never really stop dating your partner. Having quality time is so important and forces you to focus on each other. If you have kids or an overwhelming job, etc. it's easy to make date night or a walk in the park, something that isn't a priority. We have been trying to take a least 1-2 nights or evenings a month to ourselves, time for just us and it's made a giant change in our relationship as well.
3. COME BACK TO REALITY
It's easy to go online, watch the latest episode of 'Bachelor in Paradise' or see that couple you follow on YouTube and think "why can't I have that?" The answer is simple, it's not real and if it is, it's not always like that. When the cameras are off, the phones are down and the tv is black, those people are just like you and me! Take a deep breath and don't compare, it will drive you crazy!
Well, that's my wrap up on relationships for now! Sometimes small changes can make a big impact. Try these out and stay updated on my socials for a full review on 'The Five Love Languages.' It will be up after we finish the book!